Five AM

It’s five AM here in Brooklyn. I woke up at 3 today. I really hate when that happens. I’m still in bed though by now I should be getting ready for the day.

I got a job at whole foods. Produce. I’m excited and nervous. I want to do well there. So far management really likes me. I always forget how much personality is a factor for hiring. I’d get praise for energetic years before being told I’m good at what I do. I feel like I’d rather be the knowledgable unfriendly person than the cute fun one with nothing in her bed but food and falling in love. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not a total idiot, just super average in the brains department. I want to be great at whole foods. I want to be great at teaching too.

Even though I’ve been enjoying interning so far, I feel like I should be more knowledgable. And lord knows I hate all the paperwork. I don’t have any confidence at all. I hate having so much responsibility with no certainty in me that I’m doing a good job. Scary. I still have some years of schooling left. Maybe when I graduate it will feel different. I’ll work hard. I’ll cross my fingers.

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